fille_fatale | ( IC CONTACT )

Then why do I feel so...empty?

[He looked over to her with an unfocused gaze. Drink and memories and her sudden lack of embrace and everything out in the open now. She Knew. She knew and she didn't understand, but she also had yet to reject him for it.]

[Maybe she'll never understand. It wouldn't be such a surprise: there's been plenty they just don't get about each other. Not always this big, but...

The lack of focus in his eyes is worrisome, but - she's not his caretaker, right? She came out tonight to see what the hell was really up with him and to maybe slap some sense into him, and she's almost done both. That's it, that's all she owes him. That's all she wants to give him.

When she rolls her eyes, it's more at herself than him.]

I don't know, B. How would you feel when you're forty and looking at your dead wife and kids? Would that be worse?

[It would feel worse. He knew that. So, so much worse. He knew because he'd thought it over in his mind a hundred times since then. Which was the only reason he even had a comeback at all, weak as his voice sounded when he uttered the words:]

He wouldn't be able to hurt them...if they didn't exist.

[If he never married. If he never had any children.]

[This time, the eye roll is all for him.]

Yeah, great plan. What about Alfred, do you think this guy would just wait for you to outlive him? Or friends, or people you work with - what's the idea, be a freaking hermit, never talk to another person just to keep him from winning?

[She cocks her head to the side, unimpressed.]

You know how that ends, right?

Alfred can fight. He taught me how to fight.

[He deliberately mentioned Alfred specifically, although he supposed the same would apply to Detective Gordon. To a degree.]

I can think of three guys just from the Narrows who could kill him.

[And if street trash like her knows who to go to, then someone who could get the Waynes killed can probably manage a lot more.]

It doesn't matter - he'd start killing strangers, say it's your fault, and that would still get you.

[It's like she told his clone: Bruce wouldn't just try to save one person. He'd save everyone. She knows him.]

[He looked ready to argue. To protect Alfred's reputation and defend his honor because he didn't truly believe the people Selina was thinking of could really kill him.]

[...but then she continued on, and the fire soon left his eyes. Selina would see the moment his shoulders slumped in defeat. The fight to his argument fading into the night.]

You're right.

[He didn't feel close to feeling better. But he was willing to admit that much because he had no counter. And if he had no counter, then clearly it was because she was right. Right?]

Yeah, I am.

[Right. Selina liked being right. She doesn't so much like the slump in his shoulders this time, but everything has its price.

Damn it.]

So shake it off already. You did the only thing you could do.

[If only it were that easy. He lifted his gaze to look to her again, but his expression barely changed.]

How did you?

[Shake it off. She had killed before. It had been...not completely dissimilar to Bruce situation, although he did consider there to be a huge difference between pushing someone out a window in momentary desperation as opposed to driving cold, hard steel through someone's heart and watching the life fade from them.]

[There's plenty different - in the situations, the victims, them. She doesn't know how to answer at first, so she shrugs.]

It's not like he was someone I cared about. He was gonna screw you over, maybe get you killed. [He was going to do it where she couldn't look out for him, too.]

I told you, gotta me ruthless out here. [She gestures vaguely down, toward the city.] Ain't a lotta point in punishing yourself for what you have to do.

[His eyes followed her gesturing, although they lingered on the city skyline for a long moment. Seeing behind the dotted lights and seemingly perpetual shadows and the movement constantly shifting between the two. Seeing the city for what it was. What it always had been. What it could be.]

[What it probably never would.]

I wish you didn't have to. [He was frowning now, although it was a slight improvement from the defeated expression a moment prior.] I wish none of us had to. That Gotham wasn't a place where you have to kill to protect the ones you love.

It shouldn't...it shouldn't have to be this way.

Yeah, well.

[She's not sure what's caught his attention - sure, sometimes the city still entrances her when she's up somewhere high, like this, but she didn't really think the lights caught his attention the same way. Glancing between his expression and the skyline, Selina arches her eyebrows.]

That's the way it is. Not like we're gonna change anything.

[He was thinking. About...thoughts that were not new to him, but were now being thought in a slightly new light. With a new perspective. And an even deeper understanding about the heart of their city than ever before.]

Maybe.

[She makes a face at him.]

What's that supposed to mean? [She doesn't like not knowing what he means.]

[He didn't answer.]

[For a time, he didn't even look at her. Didn't move. He might as well not have heard her at all, even though they both knew he did. When he finally did turn back, he looked far more exhausted than he had before. But the kind that came with a release of adrenaline. A weight no longer quite so heavy on his shoulders. Not gone--he had a feeling its presence would linger for a long time to come--but he felt like he could actually come up for air.]

I'm glad you came tonight.

[She very nearly loses her patience, shifts her weight to walk away when he finally deigns to acknowledge her again.

It cools her ire some. Enough. Lucky him. Besides - he looks more...like himself.]

Oh good, you're acting normal-weird again.

[He did smirk a little at that.]

Is there any 'normal' without the 'weird' for you?

With you? [She pulls a face, considering for half a second before shaking her head.]

Doubt it.

In other words, you're convinced I come only in varying degrees of 'weird'.

[It was either the lingering drink or the heaviness of the prior conversation that made this one seem so...inconsequential. He couldn't bring himself to feel offended.]

Yeah, because it's true.

[It is inconsequential. It's even a little fun, something that - well, he used to be sorely missing. She's kind of been missing it, too.]

I can be normal.

[See him, being underaged drunk? That counted as normal, didn't it? ~~If one ignored the fact that he got this way by buying the club~~]

[How is she supposed to ignore that very important tidbit?? Most kids have to work harder than that. She shakes her head at him.]

You make normal look weird.

[He pouted. Which definitely wasn't weird at all.]

You won't even give me a chance!

Come on. Give me something normal to be. Do. Whatever. I'll bet you I can.

Yeah?

[She certainly looks like she's considering it.]

What do I get when you lose?

Whatever you want.

[Within reason, was the unspoken stipulation, but even some of her more "unreasonable" requests were still within his power to grant. So. Choose wisely, Kyle.]

But I won't lose.

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